Abel Tesfaye, Daniel Lopatin, Jeff Gitelman, Max Martin, Oscar Thomas Holter, Quincy D. Jones
Looking back now, I didn't know what it was supposed to be
And, and it's like raising kids, man
If you weren't raised, you don't know how to raise, you know?
I just did the best that I could with them because
They know fucking well I love them
But I didn't do the best I could
I didn't know what the fuck I was doing
I didn't
I will never forget watching my mother get put in a straightjacket
And taken out of my home when I was only seven years old
She was diagnosed with Dementia praecox and put in a mental institution
Leaving my daddy alone with me and my little brother Lloyd
I later had an evil stepmother who further cemented the idea that I didn't need a mother
Growing up without one had long lasting impressions
I didn't fully understand until much later in life
It bled into my relationships with family
And those I had become romantically involved with
Whenever I got too close to a woman, I would cut her off
Part of that was vindictive and partially based on fear
But it was also totally subconscious
Looking back is a bitch, isn't it?
Looking back now, I didn't know what it was supposed to be
Guardando indietro adesso, non sapevo quello che era destinato ad essere
And, and it's like raising kids, man
E, ed è come crescere bambini, uomo
If you weren't raised, you don't know how to raise, you know?
Se non sei stato cresciuto, non sai come crescere, capisci?
I just did the best that I could with them because
Ho solo fatto il meglio che potevo fare con loro perché
They know fucking well I love them
Loro lo sanno fottutamente bene che li amo
But I didn't do the best I could
Ma non ho fatto il meglio che potessi fare
I didn't know what the fuck I was doing
Non sapevo che cazzo stessi facendo
I didn't
Non lo sapevo
I will never forget watching my mother get put in a straightjacket
Non mi dimenticherò mai guardare mia madre messa in una camicia di forza
And taken out of my home when I was only seven years old
E portata via dalla mia casa quando avevo solo sette anni
She was diagnosed with Dementia praecox and put in a mental institution
Le avevano diagnosticato demenza precoce e messe in un manicomio
Leaving my daddy alone with me and my little brother Lloyd
Lasciando mio papà da solo con e il mio fratello minore Lloyd
I later had an evil stepmother who further cemented the idea that I didn't need a mother
Dopo ho avuto una matrigna diabolica che ha poi ha cementato l'idea di non aver avuto bisogno di una madre
Growing up without one had long lasting impressions
Crescere senza una ha avuto delle lunghe conseguenze
I didn't fully understand until much later in life
Non ho completamente capito fino a molto più avanti nella vita
It bled into my relationships with family
Ha sanguinato attraverso la relazione con la mia famiglia
And those I had become romantically involved with
E quelle con cui sono stato coinvolto romanticamente
Whenever I got too close to a woman, I would cut her off
Ogni volta che mi avvicinavo ad una donna, la tagliavo fuori
Part of that was vindictive and partially based on fear
Parte di quello era vendicativo e parzialmente basato sulla paura
But it was also totally subconscious
Ma era del tutto nel mio subconscio
Looking back is a bitch, isn't it?
Guardando indietro è una puttana, vero?
Looking back now, I didn't know what it was supposed to be
Pensando no passado agora, eu não sabia o que deveria ser
And, and it's like raising kids, man
E, e é como criar filhos, cara
If you weren't raised, you don't know how to raise, you know?
Se você não foi criado, você não sabe como criar, sabe?
I just did the best that I could with them because
Só fiz o melhor que pude com eles porque
They know fucking well I love them
Eles sabem muito bem que eu os amo
But I didn't do the best I could
Mas eu não fiz o melhor que pude
I didn't know what the fuck I was doing
Eu não sabia o que diabos eu estava fazendo
I didn't
Eu não sabia
I will never forget watching my mother get put in a straightjacket
Eu nunca vou esquecer de ver minha mãe ser colocada em uma camisa de força
And taken out of my home when I was only seven years old
E tirada da minha casa quando eu tinha apenas sete anos
She was diagnosed with Dementia praecox and put in a mental institution
Ela foi diagnosticada com demência precoce e colocada em um hospital psiquiátrico
Leaving my daddy alone with me and my little brother Lloyd
Deixando meu pai sozinho, comigo e meu irmão mais novo Lloyd
I later had an evil stepmother who further cemented the idea that I didn't need a mother
Mais tarde, tive uma madrasta malvada que cimentou a ideia de que eu não precisava de uma mãe
Growing up without one had long lasting impressions
Crescer sem uma mãe teve uma influência duradoura
I didn't fully understand until much later in life
Eu não entendi completamente até bem mais tarde na vida
It bled into my relationships with family
Isso afetou minhas relações com a família
And those I had become romantically involved with
E aquelas pessoas com quem me envolvi romanticamente
Whenever I got too close to a woman, I would cut her off
Sempre que eu me aproximava muito de uma mulher, eu a afastava
Part of that was vindictive and partially based on fear
Parte disso era vingança e parte baseado no medo
But it was also totally subconscious
Mas também foi totalmente subconsciente
Looking back is a bitch, isn't it?
Olhar para trás é uma merda, não é?
Looking back now, I didn't know what it was supposed to be
Mirando hacia atrás ahora, no sabía qué esperar
And, and it's like raising kids, man
Es como criar niños
If you weren't raised, you don't know how to raise, you know?
Si nadie te crio, no sabes cómo hacerlo
I just did the best that I could with them because
Hice lo mejor que pude con ellos
They know fucking well I love them
Saben muy bien que los amo
But I didn't do the best I could
Pero o lo hice de la mejor manera
I didn't know what the fuck I was doing
No sabía qué carajo estaba haciendo
I didn't
No
I will never forget watching my mother get put in a straightjacket
Jamás olvidaré cuando vi cómo le pusieron una camisa de fuerza a mi madre
And taken out of my home when I was only seven years old
Y se la llevaron de casa cuando yo solo tenía siete años
She was diagnosed with Dementia praecox and put in a mental institution
Le diagnosticaron demencia precoz y la llevaron a una clínica psiquiátrica
Leaving my daddy alone with me and my little brother Lloyd
Y quedó mi papá solo conmigo y mi hermanito Lloyd
I later had an evil stepmother who further cemented the idea that I didn't need a mother
Después tuve una madrastra malvada que más me hizo pensar que no necesitaba una madre
Growing up without one had long lasting impressions
Crecer sin una me hizo tener una impresión duradera
I didn't fully understand until much later in life
Que no comprendí hasta mucho tiempo después
It bled into my relationships with family
Pero afectó mi relación con la familia
And those I had become romantically involved with
Y las personas con las que me involucré románticamente
Whenever I got too close to a woman, I would cut her off
Siempre que me acercaba mucho a una mujer, cortaba la relación
Part of that was vindictive and partially based on fear
En parte por rencor y en parte por miedo
But it was also totally subconscious
Pero era totalmente inconsciente
Looking back is a bitch, isn't it?
Ahora que lo pienso, es una porquería, ¿no?
Looking back now, I didn't know what it was supposed to be
En regardant en arrière maintenant, je ne savais pas ce que c'était censé être
And, and it's like raising kids, man
Et, et c'est comme élever des enfants, mec
If you weren't raised, you don't know how to raise, you know?
Si tu n'as pas été élevé, tu ne sais pas comment élever, tu sais ?
I just did the best that I could with them because
J'ai juste fait du mieux que j'ai pu avec eux parce que
They know fucking well I love them
Ils savent très bien que je les aime
But I didn't do the best I could
Mais je n'ai pas fait du mieux que j'ai pu
I didn't know what the fuck I was doing
Je ne savais pas ce que je faisais
I didn't
Je ne savais pas
I will never forget watching my mother get put in a straightjacket
Je n'oublierai jamais avoir vu ma mère se faire mettre une camisole de force
And taken out of my home when I was only seven years old
Et être emmenée hors de chez moi alors que je n'avais que sept ans
She was diagnosed with Dementia praecox and put in a mental institution
On lui a diagnostiqué une démence précoce et elle a été placée dans un hôpital psychiatrique
Leaving my daddy alone with me and my little brother Lloyd
Laissant mon père seul avec moi et mon petit frère Lloyd
I later had an evil stepmother who further cemented the idea that I didn't need a mother
Puis j'ai eu une belle-mère diabolique qui a renforcé l'idée que je n'avais pas besoin d'une mère
Growing up without one had long lasting impressions
Grandir sans mère a laissé des traces durables
I didn't fully understand until much later in life
Que je n'ai compris que bien plus tard dans ma vie
It bled into my relationships with family
Ça a déteint sur mes relations avec la famille
And those I had become romantically involved with
Et celles avec lesquelles j'ai eu une relation amoureuse
Whenever I got too close to a woman, I would cut her off
Dès que je me rapprochais trop d'une femme, je la rejetais
Part of that was vindictive and partially based on fear
C'était en partie vindicatif et en partie basé sur la peur
But it was also totally subconscious
Mais c'était aussi totalement inconscient
Looking back is a bitch, isn't it?
Regarder en arrière est une saloperie, n'est-ce pas ?
Looking back now, I didn't know what it was supposed to be
Rückblickend, weiß ich nicht, was ich davon halten soll
And, and it's like raising kids, man
Und, und es ist wie Kinder erziehen, man
If you weren't raised, you don't know how to raise, you know?
Wurdest du nicht richtig erzogen, kannst du auch nicht richtig erziehen, verstehst du?
I just did the best that I could with them because
Ich habe mein Bestes gegeben, denn
They know fucking well I love them
Sie wissen verdammt nochmal dass ich sie liebe
But I didn't do the best I could
Aber ich habe nicht mein Bestes gegeben
I didn't know what the fuck I was doing
Ich hatte keine verdammte Ahnung, was ich da tue
I didn't
Keine Ahnung
I will never forget watching my mother get put in a straightjacket
Ich werde nie vergessen wie meine Mutter in eine Zwangsjacke gesteckt wurde
And taken out of my home when I was only seven years old
Und aus meinem Hause geschleppt wurde, ich war erst sieben
She was diagnosed with Dementia praecox and put in a mental institution
Sie wurde mit Demenz diagnostiziert und in eine Anstalt gesteckt
Leaving my daddy alone with me and my little brother Lloyd
Mein Bruder Lloyd und ich wurden mit meinem Vater alleine gelassen
I later had an evil stepmother who further cemented the idea that I didn't need a mother
Dann hatte ich eine böse Stiefmutter, die mir weiter einredete das ich keine Mutter brauche
Growing up without one had long lasting impressions
Ohne eine Mutter aufzuwachsen hat Spuren hinterlassen
I didn't fully understand until much later in life
Ich habe das erst viel später in meinen Leben bemerkt
It bled into my relationships with family
Es spiegelte sich in den Beziehungen mit meiner Familie wieder
And those I had become romantically involved with
Und mit denen mit den ich mich romantisch eingelassen habe
Whenever I got too close to a woman, I would cut her off
Sobald ich Gefühle für eine Frau entwickelte, entfernte ich mich von ihr
Part of that was vindictive and partially based on fear
Teils aus Rache, teils unbewusst
But it was also totally subconscious
Doch auch sehr bewusst
Looking back is a bitch, isn't it?
Erinnerungen sind schon ein böser Spiegel, nicht wahr?
[Spoken: Quincy Jones]
그게 다야
지금 다시 돌이켜보면, 내가 뭘 어찌해야 할지 몰랐다고 해야 하나
꼬맹이를 키우는 것 같았달까, 그래
네가 부모 없이 자랐다면, 어떻게 애 키우는 법을 알겠어, 그렇지?
난 내 최선을 다했어, 왜냐면
걔네들은 내가 걔네를 존나게 사랑하는 걸 잘 알거든
근데 최고로 잘해주진 못했어,
난 ㅆㅂ 내가 뭔 짓을 하는 건지도 몰랐다고
I didn't
몰랐어
난 영원히 못 잊어, 우리 엄마가 구속복 입고
일곱 살짜리 아이 앞에서 끌려나가는 그 모습을
우리 엄마는 조발성 치매 진단받고 정신병원에 입원당했어
우리 아빠는 나랑 내 남동생이랑 같이 남겨졌고
나중엔 엄마가 필요 없다는 생각에 확신만 불어넣어 주는 계모도 만났지
부모 없이 자라는 건 내 인생에 큰 영향이 됐어.. 훨씬 더 늦게까지 깨닫지 못했었지
가족들과 달콤한 시간을 보냈던 사람들과의 관계에도 영향을 미쳐서
내가 어떤 여자랑 잘 되고 있다 싶으면, 그냥 관계를 끊어버렸지
일부는 보복하자고 하는 마음에서, 일부는 두려움에서부터였어
내가 원해서 한 일이기도 한데..
돌아보니까 나 진짜 나쁜 새끼네, 안 그래?
[Перевод песни The Weeknd — «A Tale by Quincy»]
[Скит: Куинси Джонс]
Вот и всё
Оглядываясь назад, я не знал тогда, чем это всё обернётся
И это как воспитывать детей, чувак
Если вас не воспитывали, то вы и не знаете, как воспитывать, понимаете?
Я просто пытался делать для них всё, потому что
Они прекрасно, блять, знают, что я люблю их
Но я не сделал всё, что мог
Я не знал, какого хрена я делаю
Не знал...
Я никогда не забуду, как на мою мать надевали смирительную рубашку
Её забрали, когда мне было всего семь лет
Ей поставили диагноз «шизофрения» и поместили в психиатрическую клинику
Мой папа остался один со мной и моим младшим братом Ллойдом
Позже у меня была злая мачеха, которая ещё больше укрепила меня в мысли, что мне не нужна мать
То, что я рос без неё, оказывало на меня длительное влияние, которое я полностью осознал намного позже
Это отразилось на моих отношениях с семьёй и теми, с кем у меня были романтические связи
Когда казалось, что я слишком сблизился с женщиной, я расставался с ней
Отчасти это было местью, отчасти основано на страхе
Но это также было полностью на подсознательном уровне
Привычка оглядываться назад — та ещё сука, не так ли?
अब पीछे मुड़कर देखें तो मुझे नहीं पता था कि यह क्या होना चाहिए था
और यह बच्चों की परवरिश करने जैसा है, यार
यदि आप नहीं उठाए गए थे, वे नहीं जानते कि कैसे उठाना है, आप जानते हैं?
मैंने उनके साथ बस इतना अच्छा किया कि मैं उनके साथ कर सकता था क्योंकि वे साला जानते हैं 'अच्छी तरह से मैं उनसे प्यार करता हूँ
लेकिन मैंने वह सर्वश्रेष्ठ नहीं किया जो मैं कर सकता था - मुझे नहीं पता था कि मैं क्या बकवास कर रहा था - मैंने नहीं किया
जब मैं केवल सात साल का था तब मैं अपनी माँ को स्ट्रेटजैकेट में डालते हुए और अपने घर से बाहर जाते हुए देखना कभी नहीं भूलूंगा
उसे डिमेंशिया प्राइकॉक्स का पता चला था और मेरे डैडी को मेरे और मेरे छोटे भाई लॉयड के साथ छोड़कर एक मानसिक संस्थान में डाल दिया गया था।
बाद में मेरी एक दुष्ट सौतेली माँ थी जिसने इस विचार को और पुख्ता किया कि मुझे माँ की ज़रूरत नहीं है
बिना किसी के बड़े होने पर लंबे समय तक चलने वाले प्रभाव थे मैं जीवन में बहुत बाद तक पूरी तरह से समझ नहीं पाया था
यह परिवार के साथ मेरे रिश्तों में बह गया और जिनके साथ मैं रोमांटिक रूप से जुड़ गया था
जब भी मैं किसी महिला के बहुत करीब होता, मैं उसे काट देता
इसका एक हिस्सा प्रतिशोधी था और आंशिक रूप से डर पर आधारित था, लेकिन यह पूरी तरह से अवचेतन भी था
पीछे मुड़कर देखना एक कुतिया है, सहज?
Otóż to
Patrząc teraz wstecz, nie wiedziałem, co to miało być
I to jest jak wychowywanie dzieci, chłopie
Jeśli nie zostałeś wychowany, nie wiesz jak wychować, wiesz?
Po prostu zrobiłem z nimi wszystko, co mogłem, ponieważ
Kurewsko dobrze wiedzą, że ich kocham
Ale nie zrobiłem wszystkiego, co mogłem
Nie wiedziałem, co do cholery robię
Ja nie
Nigdy nie zapomnę patrzenia, jak moja mama zostaje włożona w kaftan bezpieczeństwa
I wywieziony z domu, gdy miałem zaledwie siеdem lat
Zdiagnozowano u niej Demеntia praecox i umieszczono ją w szpitalu psychiatrycznym
Zostawiając mojego tatusia samego ze mną i młodszym bratem Lloydem
Później miałam złą macochę, która jeszcze bardziej ugruntowała ideę, że nie potrzebuję matki
Dorastanie bez niej miało długotrwały wpływ, którego w pełni rozumiałem dopiero znacznie później w życiu
To wlało się w moje relacje z rodziną i tymi, z którymi się romantycznie związałam
Ilekroć zbliżałem się do kobiety, odcinałem się jej
Częściowo było to mściwe, a częściowo oparte na strachu
Ale to też było całkowicie podświadome
Patrzenie wstecz to suka, prawda?
[Konuşma: Quincy Jones]
İşte bu kadar
Şimdi geriye dönüp baktığımda; ne olması gerektiğini bilmiyordum
Ve bu çocuk büyütmek gibi, dostum
Eğer doğru yetiştirilmediysen, nasıl yetiştirileceğini bilmiyorsundur, anlıyor musun?
Onlarla yapabileceğimin en iyisini yaptım çünkü
Onları sevdiğimi çok iyi biliyorlar
Ama elimden gelenin en iyisini yapmadım
Ne yaptığımı bilmiyordum
Yapmadım
Annemin deli gömleği giymesini gördüğüm zamanı asla unutmayacağım
Ve henüz yedi yaşındayken evimizden alındı
Erken bunama teşhisi kondu ve akıl hastanesine yatırıldı
Babamı benimle vе küçük kardeşim Lloyd'la yalnız bıraktı
Daha sonra kötü bir üvey annem oldu vе bir anneye ihtiyacım olmadığı fikrini daha da pekiştirdi
Onsuz büyümenin uzun süreli bir etkisi oldu, hayatımın çok sonraki zamanlarına kadar tam olarak anlayamadım
Ailemle ve aşk yaşadığım kişilerle olan ilişkilerimi mahvetti
Ne zaman bir kadına çok yaklaşsam, onunla birdenbire irtibatımı keserdim
Bunun bir kısmı kinden geliyordu ve kısmende korkuya dayanıyordu
Ama aynı zamanda tamamen bilinçaltımdan kaynaklıydı
Geriye bakmak çok kötü, değil mi?