Get on Santa's Right Side

If you’re like me you spent the year
Honkin’ horns and flippin’ birds
Gunning yellows, rolling reds
Not lettin’ no school bus merge
Lest you forget December comes
With a reckoning at the end
Someone’s up north keepin’ score
And for you the rules won't be bent, No!

Get on Santa's right side
Ho, ho, hey
Get on Santa's right side
Ho, ho, hey
He's loading up his sleigh
Ho, ho, hey
Hell, you don't want no lump of coal Christmas Day
Ho, ho, hey
Ho, ho, hey
Ho, ho, hey

If you're like me you spent the year
Trollin' snowflakes on the web
Poundin' brewskies at the kitchen table
Shootin' squirrels off the backyard fence
Firm in your belief you've finally found
Your permanent happy spot
Well someone's on the rooftop shakin' his head
With one less chimney to drop down

Get on Santa's right side
Ho, ho, hey
Get on Santa's right side
Ho, ho, hey
He's loading up his sleigh
Ho, ho, hey
Lo, you don't want no lump of coal Christmas Day
Ho, ho, hey
Ho, ho, hey
Ho, ho, hey

Play it for me Lumps

If you're like me Santa brings joy
Like an empty cookie tin
A fatuous, fictional, fart-propelled figment
From some Mad Avenue ad man
But just snap your suspenders of disbelief
To see truth in wondrous things
Soon you'll hear the thunder of reindeer above
You better kneel down and kiss the ring
Dong, ding dong
Ding-dong, ding-dong
Ding-dong, ding-dong
Ding

Get on Santa's right side
Ho, ho, hey
Get on Santa's right side
Ho, ho, hey
He's loading up his sleigh
Ho, ho, hey
No, you don't want no lump of coal Christmas Day
Ho, ho, hey
Ho, ho, hey
Ho, ho, hey

Get on Santa's right side
Ho, ho, hey
Get on Santa's right side
Ho, ho, hey
He's rummaging through your fridge
Ho, ho, hey
You didn't leave him no brewskis, dawwww
And he's miffed
So he split
With all his gifts
He who gives, so shall he gets
He who gives, so shall he gets
He who gives, so shall he gets
He who gives, so shall he gets

He who gives
He who gives
He who gives
So shall he gets

Jolly hey

He who gives, so shall he gets