Father Christmas

When I was four I believed in Santa Claus
Though I knew it was my dad
And we would hang up the stockings at Christmas
I'd open presents and I'd be glad

But then last year I played Father Christmas
I stood outside a department store
A gang of kids came over and mugged me
And knocked my reindeer to the floor

They said...
Father Christmas, give us some money
Don't mess around with those silly toys
Beat you up if you don't hand it over
We want your bread so don't make us annoyed
Give all the toys to the little rich boys

Don't give my brother a Steve Austin outfit
Don't give my sister a cuddly toy
Don't want a jigsaw, Monopoly money
We only want the real McCoy

Father Christmas, give us some money
Don't mess around with those silly toys
Beat you up if you don't hand it over
We want your bread so don't make us annoyed

And give my daddy a job 'cause he needs one
He's got a lot of mouths to feed
And if you've got one, I'll take a machine gun
So I can shoot all the kids down my street

Father Christmas, give us some money
Don't mess around with those silly toys
Beat you up if you don't hand it over
We want your bread so don't make us annoyed
Give all the toys to the little rich boys

Have yourself a very Merry Christmas
Have yourself a good time
Remember the kids who got nothin'
While you're drinkin' down your wine

Father Christmas, give us some money
Don't mess around with those silly toys
Father Christmas, give us some money
We'll beat ya up so don't make us annoyed

Father Christmas, give us some money
Don't mess around with those silly toys
Beat you up if you don't hand it over
We want your bread so don't make us annoyed
Give all the toys to the little rich boys