regret

I just wish I could brush away the past
Sometimes I cry, I regret what ive become
I hope that you forget all that ive done
My life is no longer worth keeping alive

You would think I had learned my lessons
Yet im fucking rotting dying
Need to reconcile and get used to crying
Every night considering dying
I do not feel like trying
All this shit be so fucking tiring
I do not feel like trying
Every day in a fucking pit
Trapped with fucking guilt
Building up in my still body with nobody
I cannot commit to nobody
Scared ill break your trust
And bitch, I cannot ever get enough

Life is a game and I am always losing
Call me selfish because im always choosing
That I will die inside my wrong doings
Burn a fucking fire and leave me flaming burning
I do not care for the future that im churning
Call me worn out cause my gears are never turning
So dysfunctional and im never fucking learning
I just wanna make the right choice and stop yearning

If I was a playing card id be the joker
Throw me to side im not needed in poker
Everyone can fucking laugh at me while I poke her
Light a fucking joint and then ima need to toke her
Sarcophagus? Nevertheless, bury distress
Underneath my fucking grave lies a pile of heads
I'm the holocaust think I
Got my finger on the trigger
Bouta kill all of these motherfuckers in my head
All my brains on the wall

Sorry dumb bitch, you cannot have it all
I do not give a fuck about your fall
Leave you in silence and im standing tall
Walking around sneaking around the walls
Scream my name and pray for my downfall
Motherfuckers hate me, I cant have it all
Nobody fucking likes you, we cant have it all
Ill be waiting at the next hall
To hurt myself by slamming my head against the motherfucking wall

I just wish I could brush away the past
Sometimes I cry, I regret what ive become
I hope that you forget all that ive done
My life is no longer worth keeping alive