Icarus & the Skyline

I heard you tapping
On the door last night
Bruised knuckles
Against chipped wood—
I swear I had been mistaking
The sounds with raindrops
Falling from my eyes still

The vacancies that you have left
Continue to make their way
Into my daily experiences
But in all seriousness—
I have come to the conclusion
Of what was truly lacking:
The complete compression
Of the sentence
"son, family comes before
Anything else in the end"

But I never knew what
A family meant to begin with
While you were just sitting there
Looking at me hopeless, hoping
I'd get through this

Not understanding how it feels
To fly against the clouds of
Unhappiness being disguised
As blissful numbness
All I felt was the injustice
In your loveless embrace
Afraid, I breathed in, exhaled
And escaped the misplacement
From your forbidden mistakes
Yet despite the headaches
Heartaches, and casual heartbreaks
My heart still retains its original shape

And I still remember the exact
Location of where I found you
And your slain love one
Won by another... and what
Were your words to her?

"they're over eighteen
They can deal with
These types of things!"

Tou guided me back towards
The cliff where you left your
Insecurities up high
Out of sight, grabbed me
Momentarily and I felt
The love even if
It was just temporary
I stepped towards the edge
And you convinced
Me to jump

You could flown
Closer to the sun

You could flown
Closer to your son
But you never taught me
What to do when the
Wind talked back!
I gravitated towards different
States of elevated gratitude
Until alternating choices caused
A climate change that changed
Up my whole mental attitude

I was higher mentally as
My thoughts increased
In latitude. I thought these
Thoughts came in pairs
Like lovers' hearts have
A tendency to do
Ental clarity is a rarity
Especially when your
Words talk behind your back
But you never taught me
What to do when the
Wind talked back!

I used to love you, but
Not just in the past tense
Though that's the only way
It makes sense in present tense
But aside from all the negative
Manifestations, you provided
The foundation of what it means
To love and to be loved like
Verbs in conjugation
All I ever wanted from that
Point in time was for you
To share the same vision
Of my eternal bearer that
You had once with time
I often wonder what your
Signature will look like in
My sympathy card
Dad