Pride

Pride comes before the fall
Pride comes before the fall
But in between the pride and the fall
There's usually a bottle of Tequila

Tequila comes before the fall
And pride comes before Tequila
But in between the pride and Tequila
There's usually a lady who you love with all your heart and all your head
Who implies that you are bad in bed

Whereas before that lady you though sexually you rocked
That you went off like a frog in a sock

Pride comes before the fall
And the fall comes after the lady
And the lady comes before the Tequila
But in between the lady and Tequila
There's usually an argument incited by the fracture in your pride
Where you tell the lady she wasn't much to write home about either

That is, if hypothetically, you habitually wrote home about your sexual partners, which you don't
But even if you did, you wouldn't do
That's when the lady throws a shoe

Tequila comes before the fall
And pride comes before Tequila
And the Tequila comes after the lady... and the shoe
And in between Tequila and the fall
There's usually an unforgettable amnesiac evening with your mates with equal measures of sexism and pull
And a great deal of amusing hi-jinx involving nude runs though your old high school
Til you vomit on a football pitch
After which
You have no pride at all
Followed by the sweet, sweet taste of self-hatred
Which can be loosely described as the fall

So though the Bible may be chronologically correct when it states that a fall is preceded by pride
Like all Bible lessons, it should only be used as a guide