Novocaine

[Intro]
Please leave a message after the tone
*beep*

[Verse]
Every night the light fades, my happiness goes with it
Haunted by these memories I can't help but revisit
Cryin' out for help, but nobody wants to listen
What's it gonna take to break me out of this prison?
Time has passed but nothin's changed except I'm more deranged
I'm so out of it, snap out of it, I can't, I'm disengaged
Now I'm off the drugs, they've been flowin' through my veins
I've found a way to numb the pain, novocainе
I still can't believe what happеned, sadness keeps on rainin' down
Nothin' ever goes as planned, I thought I'd be okay by now
Lookin' back, I had it backwards, love is what I chased around
Someone else can't make you happy, all you'll do is make them drown
Take it from me, these angels stay but they'll leave
And now I've either gotta heal or kill myself to be free
Cuz I'm so manic, every decision I make is extreme
I still don't know what my purpose is, I don't know what it means
God, I think I'm finished, I don't think I wanna live
But y'all don't want me dead yet, I got too much left to give
I cut slits on my wrist, they remind me to exist
I done came too far to give up, it's too late to call it quits
I've been trippin' for a minute, off the pills, I'm an abuser
All alone and got no home and got no soul and got no future
And my mind is full of voices, can't get rid of these intruders
They say time heals all, those ain't nothin' more than rumours
I've been down bad, still me, I'm still sad
Clip full of bullets but I'm still weak, I can't blast
Livin' for the moment, I'ma die young and live fast
I can't wait until the day when all I see is pitch black
Maybe nothin's real, I can't even believe in myself
Everything I feel is tellin' me I can't be myself
If the truth reveals, will I be able to free myself?
If the truth reveals, will I be able to see myself?
I will never know but that doesn't matter, does it?
Cuz no one gives a fuck, I'm just a topic of discussion
A name they'll entertain, another source of pointless judgement
I'm a picture in a frame, they can look but they can't touch it
Novocaine, novocaine, fuck the money, fuck the fame
I ain't changin', switchin' lanes, it rains forever, I'm the same
I'ma go against the grain, they can think that I'm insane
But what they consider normal's an illusion in their brains
Every night the light fades, my happiness goes with it
When your heart broke and you're scarred and you can't stitch it
There's somethin' missin' in me, a space that I can't fill in
There's gotta be an answer out there but what is it?
I'm second guessin' everything I feel inside within
I'm insecure, I'm sad, I'm not comfortable in my skin
I never chose to be me or live in this life of sin
Some say better days are ahead but I'm not convinced

[Outro]
Faded Memory 2
In a world of my own forever