He Never Came Back

An old Jane about 49 came in to view the town,
she registered up at Smith's Hotel as Miss Ada Brown.
She said she was just 25 and that she was in love
with a young lad about 16, she called him her turtledove.

The wedding day at last arrived, the birds did merrily sing,
he touched her up for a hundred to go out and buy the ring.
He never came back, no, he never came back
he's been gone for a year or more.

That sassy young thing better have that ring,
when we meet on that beautiful shore.

I went down to a restaurant as hungry as a bear,
and like a raving thief I did, I grabbed the bill of fare.
The waiter said, Now what for you?" "A piece of steak !" I said,
he'd taken my order and bowed his head and slowly walked away.
No, he never came back, no, he never came back,
I waited an hour or more.
His neck I will break, if he has not that steak
when we meet on that beautiful shore