Memoir: Entry II/Memory Lane
[Verse 1]
This is a memoir
I think I'm on the second page
And yesterday
Took a trip down some memory lanes
It's so insane
I went to Hayes
Can't keep a pace
And man I'm just all over the place
But I don't care
My minds so scattered
I'm just glad it hasn't shattered already
Man what did they tell me
Sticking to this music shit is never gonna fail me
And they helped me, picked me back up when I was feeling down
I felt the blues
Man I remember...
Back against the wall, there was no one that I could call
I heard it all
I'll be there for you anytime
You wasn't there for any time
And every time I tried to take the knife into my chest...
That's too much to confess
I'm a mess
But I been blessed with this rapping shit
Yeah, I guess
This shits a test
You gotta flex with your mind
You stay forgetting the times
Just take a trip down memory lane and hope the story's the same
And if it ain't then oh well, they say everything change
[Part II/Memory Lane]
I took a trip down memory lane just today actually
It was a nice experience
I remember back when I was 17 and I would think "man, when I'm famous I definitely gotta mention this in my 'when I was 17' episode."
I had made this song called "The Help" for my first album
What actually motivated it was that I wanted to do this tour thing...
My mom said no
It destroyed me
Like to the point that I just didn't want to make music anymore
I was done
And I remember this one time...
I was so happy
My mom had just gotten married
Just moved into a new house
And I mean an actual house
It wasn't big but it was comfy
I miss that place on Hayes Avenue
Going to a new school
It was nice
And then...
That night...
I don't wanna get into much detail... But it lead to a divorce
New city
New school
Ugh
Back to happy thoughts
I remember meeting my dad for the first time
Well the first time that I would actually remember in life
It was May
2011
I was in school and I got called down to the office
Specifically it was my Algebra II class
I knew I wasn't in trouble so naturally I was pretty confused
I get to the office and I see my mom
We get to talking and then this guy walks in
My father
It didn't take very long for him to be in tears looking at what I would assume was a mirror image of him at that age
I didn't cry...
At least while I was in the office
I didn't know what to think
I won't lie I was really happy about it though
But I guess that's the reason I began to hurt so much once the broken promises followed
We don't talk anymore...
Maybe one day...
One day when I can actually forgive him and mean it
Ugh
I need more happy thoughts
I remember Halloween one year
It was while my mom was still married
We did a scavenger hunt in my basement
It was all Ronnies idea
Definitely my favorite Halloween ever
I'll never forget it
Back to 2011...
My great grandmother died...
So I made her a promise that I would never give up with her watching over me
I'm keeping it
Another important promise in my life
My tenth birthday
I promised that when I have kids I'll always be there for them, and be the father I never got to have myself
There's that memoir