Son of a Fridge

An icy wind blew the day I was born
The snow fell heavily, my hopes all seemed forlorn
They threw my life into a chilling cold world
Devoid of chances, still the wheel of fortune twirled

Never! I will defy!
I will fight till the day that l die!
They say I'm in a jam now
I say: life's no apple pie!
Mama, a nasty moll
Daddy was a ham-acting clod
Caught up in a mental deep-freeze
I surely had to beat the odds!

Wanna be the top banana
Now I'm just a rotten egg
Cut the mustard, be the big cheese
For your crumbs I'll never beg

Desperate, what could I do?
Found that switch deep inside 'o my soul
One flick shifts my condition
Alters me from prey to cool

That's why they call me
A Son of a fridge
Father's a freak and
My mother a bitch
Don' mess around with
The Son of a fridge
Weird as a freak and
As mean as a bitch

Cheese it! You bloody fool!
Stand aside or I'll flick the switch
You're a beer short to a six-pack
Don't mess with the son of a fridge
Hey, girl! You look so cute!
You break my heart and I can't resist
Why do you turn away now?
Tell me why do you look so pissed?

Cause I am the top banana
Surely I'm a rotten egg
Cut the mustard, I'm the big cheese
For your crumbs I'll never beg
Freeze you! I press the key
I start trembling then I cease to move
Feels like a god-damn brain-freeze
Tricked myself, me nerdy goof

That's why they call me
A Son of a fridge
Father's a freak and
My mother a bitch
Don' mess around with
The Son of a fridge
Weird as a freak and
As mean as a bitch

That's why they call me
A Son of a fridge
Father's a freak and
My mother a bitch
Don' mess around with
The Son of a fridge
Weird as a freak and
As mean as a bitch