Ode to the Bouncer

Oh, let me in or I'll get physical with you
I just gotta dance right now, it's critical to do

No, I haven't had no dope
Lift up the velvet rope
Mr doorman stop teasing
I'm freezing out here

See, I've got friends inside
It's my birthday tonight
And I'm not wearing trainers
Not to mention knickers

It's futile to debate
With St Peter at the gate
Made of protein milkshake
And low carb intake

'Cause all in all you're just
Another prick at the door

Oh, let me in or I'll get physical with you
I just gotta dance right now, it's critical to do

Bouncer, hey bouncer,
Bouncer, bounce bounce bouncer
I just gotta dance right now, it's critical
Bouncer, bouncer

Bouncer, empowered and aroused
I see it in your trousers
And in the way you browse her
Look she's in!

What? Her dress is up to waterline
That bitch is clearly borderline
Nose as white as Snow White's, in moonlight

We stand in awe in front of
Another prick at the door

Oh, let me in or I'll get physical with you
I just gotta dance right now, it's critical to do

Bouncer, hey bouncer,
Bouncer, bounce bounce bouncer
I just gotta dance right now, it's critical
Bouncer, hey bouncer
Bounce bounce bouncer

Oh, let me in or I'll get physical
I just gotta dance right now, it's critical

So you can play karate
You thick illiterati
I'm a black belt in life
So go home to your ugly wife

You forgot in your wisdom
The window to the ladies room
A whole new possibility for a cat like me

Oh, let me in or I'll get physical with you
I just gotta dance right now, it's critical to do

Bouncer, hey bouncer,
Bouncer, bounce bounce bouncer
I just gotta dance right now, it's critical
Bouncer, hey bouncer