Loneliness Monologue/Why Can’t I Forget Females
(So I've done it... I moved far away and I can't see my friends anymore. When I remain completely still at night, I peer out the window. For that's where the invisible wave from friends' is. I live quite alone for the first time in many years, and isn't what I always wanted. Now the opportunity to do anything I want is present and undisturbed. Funny how necessary loneliness can be, but with time it is boring. One desires companionship, which in itself is hard to find. What does a companion do? If a person were sitting therе in the chair, what would change? Depеnding upon who it is of course. How could someone's unparticular personality completely alter the mentality of the room? I wonder about this. Is it mere perception or do overall conditions really seem different? All I know is that there is a void. Knowing no one could possibly join me here right now. I feel a total stranger. It is a nice feeling compared to my early life, surrounded by various friends. For those times could also become boring indeed, because it was predictably the only way I knew. And there might have been both extremes; times of hilarious frivolity, and old times of bitter ambition. In all, the art of getting along with your environment. Now, there is only myself to get along with... I cannot feel love or hate. It is a void in which I can only exist peacefully. And the emotion which is immediately prevalent, was loneliness. Not by choice, but by instinct. My friend the microphone has ears, but no eyes. I must get a camera. Then I can express my loneliness in a multimedia expression, which in turn breaks the voice I want. And gives me satisfaction more than communications. This reason, because I can choose to extend my soul upon inanimate objects and transfer them to the ones I love. This reason shows me now beyond light, temporarily. Thus, severe loneliness is buffered, and I can sleep soundly. And when I'm awake and alone, looking out at the world, I can absorb psychic electricity from local citizens, though they may be strangers. And when I can wear that energy home, and use it to reply with, as I record meaning of these notations, *???*)
I love every girl I look at
But every girl passes by
I want to enjoy their company
I need them so bad I could die
Walk up to me
Make I make your acquaintance?
I'd like to introduce myself to you
But i'm silly fantasizing
I have no idea of details
My desire's exaggerated
Why can't i forget females?