1-900 Lover

Baby, I'm doing fine since you left me
And my friends seem to think I have a lot more time
But as far as I'm concerned, all the money that I earn
Is going to this 1-900 line
She said I was the greatest lover she'd ever heard
She said that I had too much love for you
And for a small five dollar cover she'd be my long distance lover
And so long as I pay she'll never say we're through

[Chorus]
'Cause I'm a 1-900 user and a telephone abuser
But I've got an eight hundred dollar credit line
Yeah, and I've got you to thank, dear, that the money in the bank here
Is going to that little girl out in Carolina

She said that her phone name was Madonna
And she said she was just like a virgin, too
I said I don't care about your old virginity just boost my masculinity
And tell me that your love is ever true

[Chorus]

Baby, I'm doing fine since you left me
And I'm glad that you just up and let me be
Yeah, and you can tell your mother
That I done found another
And I wouldn't call even if you were toll free

[Chorus]