My Favorite Mistake Was You

Alone at night I think about what I'd do
If the person I was meant to be ever shines through
How I spend my days trying to be
The kind of kid that you want close to you
And I know how this one ends

We want the ones that we can't have
So what the fuck is wrong with me?
Why can't I let go of you?
The first time all I saw were your eyes

And now I can't stand to look inside them
It's not your distance that's killing me
It's being close to you that makes me close to myself
And I can't stand the way I am

I push away the ones who love me
And I embrace the apathy
And hang from all your lies
And if I could I'd take back my words
And heal my heart

If I could I'd take back the secrets
My stitched up heart
If I could I'd forget your face
A brand new start
If I could I'd show you how
You tore me apart