D.N.R (The Death Of Me)

Give me a chance to explain
Though there's no real "reason" for this
The verdict is in
The jury's decided that I'm sentenced to cease to exist
My parents made a mistake
They were just too young to admit
They made a few in my raising
But their worst was my birth so how could I call them unfit
My alcohol problem
I think I'm in too deep to quit
Besides that it seems that my loved ones are all who really have "problems" with it
Don't wake me up
Don't bring me back, I'm through
Don't say I'm fine
You can't be sure that's true.
I know I've grown absent
And I know you're all sick of my shit
You think that I'm crazy, and nothing can save me but I know that you'll never relent
Don't tell me I'm needed
Stop feeding me all of that shit
The guilt that I live with is painful without being told I've abandoned my kids
I'm aware I've been distant
But I can't go out looking like this
My psyche is fucked
I ain't bathed in a month, it's getting harder to cover the stench
So when I go
Just burn me in my bed
Don't make me up
And surround me when I'm dead
Death's here to comfort me
He's waiting outside of my door
Death hasn't "come" for me
He's been stalking me since I was born
So leave a trail of petals where you think that I'd go
Because I hope that you'd know
I know that you know
Transpose me as an angel in the snow
And I will always follow you where ever you go