This Is Raymond Bien
Hello! This is, without any doubt, Raymond Bien. For you, it's been only one year since my last acquisitional message to you regarding the active state of General Injectables and Signals Incorporated. And so, it's finally time for you to learn what us here at GISI have been up to!
Do not stay away from me, all my bones can be seen
At the beginning of this millennium, we quietly merged with nearly every other global corporation of note with the modest goal of translating the world's various governments, religions and ethical belief systems into various kinds of money! And we're making the right kind of progress. Not in spite of, but precisely because of those headlines screaming: recession! Money isn't going anywhere. You may have noticed that recent editorials, trying to posit the imaginary basis of our modern economy, remain suspiciously quiet when it comes to cancer! And GISI annihilates cancer in a way that gives cancer enough space to thrive on its own terms
We must learn to DEVOUR the rainforests, not as corporations but as people! The force that creates a national border is the same force that pushes us over that border. A simple glance at 10,000 newspapers reveals nothing but the one-word international headline, clawing into the minds of anyone with eyes willing to be sliced into pieces
How many of your children will die? Well, if those numbers are available to our investors, they're barely relevant to those children who will be DOING the actual dying! So, let's hurry up and say that we're racing to the finish line to translate every single last aspect of our culture into a system of permanent dollars. At last, our words can be final! Every luxury item you spend your money on is the LAST luxury item you will spend your money on!
Yes, if we admit that GISI's brand new five million year old brain lives in the ocean...Well, we wouldn't be admitting much, now would we? Yes, it is GISI that is behind the Chopping Channel the same way that it is GISI behind... everything, with our vast array of injectable chemicals and foods. The savings are in the card, and so are you! You're also in here with me, inside my hyper-mobile television monitor, and the scorpion in its own tiny compartment, stinging itself drunk on it's own venom while whispering the next bible slowly into your ear
It's an exciting time to stay alive, listener! Welcome to the Chopping Channel. This is Raymond Bien of General Injectables and Signals Incorporated, and I'll see you at work