Beauty Queen
Couldn't be clearer skies than we have here
Can't imagine a more beautiful pageant
Dress me up, take off the glasses
Don't want me looking like a has-been
So much weight on my shoulders
Get on stage when I'm older
Hit that cash advance to make my dad proud
'Cuz in the background
I get slapped when I act out
Wrapping chains 'round my throat till I pass out
They yell shame if I choke as the cash cow
Heinous thoughts creep up into my brain
Take the reins back as the rain cascades down
My powdered face but thankfully
Rain hides my tears
Better to be living a lie and lie out of fear
Than to slide out of gear
(Chorus)
Dress me up like a beauty queen
And assume I won't do a thing
To fight the lights away
I've tried and tried to hide the shame but
The mirror sees right through
I hate what's in my view
My thoughts are darkening quickly
And what I see is pretty sickening
Hear my name called on the speaker
Smiling faces line the bleachers
I'm ashamed of my concealer
Blinding lights, high-pitched squeals
High fives for me acting like I belong here
Fake smile and lashes to match my blonde hair
Meanwhile I'm slashing my upper thighs
Trying to come up with something nice to say when they question me
Hate the compliments
They know I've got no confidence and no confidants
But they're all looking for a pretty little debutante
So adorable and nonchalant
Curtains slide open and I close up
Start my walk and I pull my clothes up
Can't imagine falling
Everyone would go nuts
And I'd get creamed by the judges: three donuts
(Boos)
I'm sorry, I'm sorry
This isn't me
This isn't supposed to be my life
(Chorus)
Dress me up like a beauty queen
And assume I won't do a thing
To fight the lights away
I've tried and tried to hide the shame but
The mirror sees right through
I hate what's in my view
My thoughts are darkening quickly
And what I see is pretty sickening
And it's becoming apparent that as parents
You're terrified of failing and I get it
I'm just sharing the air in my lungs
You care about career and funds
But this music is inherent like the marrow in my bones
Imagine people caring when they hear it
Then sharing in the lyrics with their tears and hugs
Splitting oceans with their peers and cheers of love
Fuck the boats and hoes 'cuz that's enough
To put pen to pad and keep writing
For the lost souls like apostles in the gospels
Man I'm fighting
Scribing words 'til they're fossils
Some say it's impossible but if I can
Do it, then you can do it
Indubitably
If we all fall short of being beauty queens
There's nothing more beautiful to see
Than real human beings like you and me
(Chorus)
Dress me up like a beauty queen
And assume I won't do a thing
To fight the lights away
I've tried and tried to hide the shame but
The mirror sees right through
I hate what's in my view
My thoughts are darkening quickly
And what I see is pretty sickening
Ohhhs
See the blisters from these high heels
The shoes don't fit
But losers quit
And those are the stupid, useless punks that don't wanna win
'Cuz what's the point
Of showing mettle without a medal to show
If I do that I know that your head'll explode
So it's pedal to the metal
Till my death I'll be backpedaling
And settling for hell when heaven's pretty evident
I know
You think that I'm clowning around
When I don't have a crown to ground me
But I'm paying my dues and taking abuse
And for the first time in my life I'm sleeping soundly
No counting sheep 'cept the sheep around me
I preach the beat and we complete the feat abounding-ly
See this is me, I'll keep resounding
Some beauty queens don't need a crown or gown to be
Astounding