She’s Vibrator Dependent
[Verse 1]
Came home early one night from work
Thought my wife's in bed with a jerk
She's in there with a piece of plastic
Yelling and screamin' super deluxe creamin'
She don't want my lovestick
[Chorus]
Cause she's vibrator dependent, don't want me in it
Says I don't make the right noise
Been replaced by batteries, hey there fellas can't you see
She just wants to play with her toys
She don't want to go out and dance
She don't want to get in my pants
Just stay home and vibrate
I'm getting big blisters on my hands, thinking maybe I ain't a man
Man she ain't gonna get impregnated
[Chorus]
Cause she's vibrator dependent, don't want me in it
Says I don't make the right noise
Been replaced by batteries, hey there fellas can't you see
She just wants to play with her toys
Play with them honey
There she was, in the bathroom
Sounded like she was shaving her tallywhacker with a
Battery-powered device
Me, I'm prancing around in the living room
Got the demon jism buildup
I mean I got a severe case of it
Lot of pressure on my brain, eyeballs turning white, grabbing my tallywhacker all the time
I look her in the eye, and I say, uh, I say
"Baby baby baby baby baby baby baby baby please! Baby you got something I need, something I want
I want to put my face in the special place."
She says "what?"
"I want to put my face in the special place
Yeah, I want to get ring around the face honey
You know what I'm talking about, when the full moon comes around."
She said "Mojy wojy, you got to do something for me if you want to do that."
I said "What's that honey?"
She said "Mojy, know what you got to do? You know I got these battery powered things here, and you know I got some things plug into the wall, put 110 volts on my tallywhacker
Mojo, I want you to go out to the store, I want you to get me something, something big and ugly, gigantic vibrator, Vibratorzilla it'd be
And unplug the refrigerator Mojo, get Vibratorzilla in there and put 220 on the money, honey!"
I said "Baby, you done gone crazy."
"And then Mojo, you can put your face in the special place...
But you're gonna have to, gonna have to
Make a little noise
Took her down to see a nurse
Cure her of this terrible curse
Doctor said lady you're afflicted, now I told you not to grab it
I pronounce you addicted
She just wants to play with her toys
She's got VD, that's Vibrator Dependency now isn't it. No honey you can't plug my toes into the wall, I ain't gonna hum no more either