Trauma

I admit
It wasn't that nice
Trying to be okay when I just wanted to hide
Inside a cupcake that my mother made
And pretend to be a child again
Now I wonder what you would have looked like
What you would have eaten, what you would have hated, maybe me
Cause I am a freak
And I don't know if I really really wanted you
That's why I probably lost you
But nobody knew
Aaaaaa they call it trauma
Aaaaaa I call it therapy
Aaaaaa this is not a drama
But you should've stayed just for another day
I admit
It was like a cold shower
It woke me up from the denial I was living in
And he was there facing the empire
Of the demons that were tearing my womb apart
Now I wonder what you would have looked like
What you would have eaten, what you would have hated, maybe me
Yes I am a freak
And I don't know if I really really wanted you
That's why I probably miss you
Like a fool
Aaaaaa they call it trauma
Aaaaaa I call it therapy
Aaaaaa this is not a drama
But you should've stayed just for another day