Solitary
[Verse 1]
Pop a bunch of pills 'til I feel like I'm floatin'
Then lie still like the steel that I'm holdin'
The voices tellin' me to chill so I focus
Then I wake up and take a kneel at the toilet
I'm wondering should I say this? I'm like Vegas
'Cause myself I've been fearing and loathing
But for years I've concealed that I'm hopeless
I act the way I feel, never deal with emotions
I'm still on that muhfucking suicide tick
So I medicate and meditate 'cause truly I'm sick
My head and brain have separated, who am I with?
I'm laying in my bed all day and drooling my spit
And I could never dedicate the "do it my shit"
I'm headed straight to heaven that's as loony I get
I'm throwing all my bread away as soon as I get
But I ain't got nobody be unified with, ugh
Taking a bottle of liquor and nobody want to see my enzymes
So sick the nigga that checked himself in about ten times
Ask me if I'm in my right mind, I'm not in my
I'm 'bout to go on a killing spree, I'm counting down like ten, nine
Eight, seven, I hate voices meaning myself like am I sick
Six, five, I'mma get my revenge I'm finna drop shit
Four, three, hella go real but he's gon' be for the sor-ry
Two, one, then it flips shit then it clips shit they didn't know real
Now who want to take a trip inside my mind? (My mind)
Tell your sanity bye bye time. (Bye bye time)
I feel like I'm livin' in sci-fi time (Sci-fi time)
No J.T. I can't buy my time
If you look into my mind, yo it's kind of scary
I just wanna lay up with a Halle Berry
But I'm treating everything like it's commissary
Prob'ly 'cause my soul is in solitary
[Chorus]
Late nights in my single cell and them people turned me so dark
Felt my soul diminish I'm coexistent with those who want no part
Up what I been through
I got issues and now I feel I'm 'bout to go off
So I'm just meditatin'
No medication couldn't heal my broken cold heart
(Solitary mindstate)
Late nights in my single cell and them people turned me so dark
Felt my soul diminish I'm coexistent with those who want no part
Up what I been through
I got issues and now I feel I'm 'bout to go off
So I'm just meditatin'
No medication couldn't heal my broken cold heart
[Verse 2]
I used to have suicidal thoughts at night
Sit up in the cell with a razor blade
'Cause don't nobody care if I lost my life
So I'm watching my sanity fade away
Used to make death threats to the warden
If the CO's ain't change they ways
They put a nigga in restraints and recorded it
Made a muhfucka have to change his name
So call my ISO, nigga
I flow sicker than anybody rapping about they eyesore, nigga
Talkin' about they go real but I go realer
Hit the handle with the force of nine gorillas
You know rappers, but I know killers
You know trappers, but I don't feel ya
Leave your mind gone inside your skillet
Whatever I don't like then I'm gon' kill it
I got screws loose so I'm screwed in the mind
Really don't have one, I ain't losin' my mind
But what up if you touch me, this dude isn't mine
Institutionalized, I'm as mute as a mime
The system changed my perspective
The dark side is in me, I got the message
They treat us like a stock investment
But fuck the whole world over, no contraceptive
I confess that I've been vexed
And I'm a monster it's all connected
They target us at a young age so we call collect it
Speak negative shit dog, and y'all perfect it
If you look into my mind yo, it's kind of scary
Probably the reason why my mom ain't married
My soul's in the system and probably buried
That's why I'm just sitting solitary
[Chorus]
Late nights in my single cell and them people turned me so dark
Felt my soul diminish I'm coexistent with those who want no part
Up what I been through
I got issues and now I feel I'm 'bout to go off
So I'm just meditatin'
No medication couldn't heal my broken cold heart
(Solitary mindstate)
Late nights in my single cell and them people turned me so dark
Felt my soul diminish I'm coexistent with those who want no part
Up what I been through
I got issues and now I feel I'm 'bout to go off
So I'm just meditatin'
No medication couldn't heal my broken cold heart