Waffle Rap

Waffle crisps are great but I eat them unorthodox
Cereal in my plate, milk, and then I just close the box
What you trynna say? That's normal? Well, fucking shucks
I guess I messed that up, sorry, I'll connect the dots
You know, the ones at the back of the box
The type of shit that causes children to remember their locks
The type of gibberish horseshit Jimbob spits at the blocks
It doesn't make any sense but I'm still getting head bobs
Because I'm made of something alien
My church is Presbyterian
My Christianity is kinda bullshit like I'm Aryan
This flow is on a killer streak don't talk to me, American
Your schools are getting shot, you wish your healthcare was Canadian
It's not so good out there across the great wide ocean
Don't you sometimes wish you had a strange white potion?
Teleport away from all your ill commotions
Then you might be finally through with that motion
The finger in the middle shouldn't rise for shit
It should be resting quietly like the rest of it
The hand that feeds should not be getting any fucking bites
You fuckers end up spoiling all your fucking appetites
That's why you're very fucking thin exactly like a stick
That's why you try to work it out and find out that don't click, shtick
Well, how bout that? Mr flip ya dick pic
Send me a picture with your ugly instinct
I'll leak it on the cloud for the world to see
As hard as that'll be given your "humongous" peen
The disrespect is real when I am stepping in the booth
Going toe to toe with me? you'll get a missing tooth
So don't you try me, bitch, I will sock you like a tube
Fuck you so hard you won't get any lube
That's disgusting, it's gross, screw it, I'm outta here
You don't deserve my rhymes, I'm too imposing and towering
But wait a second, bitch, because your Jimmy boy is back
I couldn't let you wait, I had to bring you more attacks
These waffles taste so good, and oh, they're very fucking sweet
And I will never lose, and no, I never will retreat
So you bitches thought that you could have escaped my wrath
But you forgot I had a sonar, you were always on my path
I'm a heat-seeking missile and I wanna explode
So now you're gonna face me? Man, you're feeling quite bold
Not that it matters, sooner or later I'll prevail
You're getting faster, but that shit will be to no avail
You gotta blast her, but first, you shall remove her veil
I am the master, and she is now stuck in a jail
The happy bride is crying and not for the right reasons
On this bed of thorns she's lying, she will stay here for 4 seasons
Not the hotel, I mean the planet's full rotation
She's gone through hell, her journalists got full quotations
"Help! I think Jimbob just took me hostage!"
Yeah, bitch, now don't you move if you don't wanna start shit
My conscience evolves and it goes through the stages
Just like a revolver, I'm loading the gauges
And rounds upon rounds of this fire that rages
Deep inside me, and yeah, it sticks through the ages
The stone age, the bronze, the iron, the neolithic
The old days, the gods, that shit's a bit egotistic
My boy ate the rods, he's just another statistic
That 0, 8, the odds will make this bit more logistic
Man that right there was a delightful meal
I gave a ripe scare to a weird Bible seal
Yep, it was a Christian maritime mammal
Welp, I guess you gotta tooth enamel
I'm not your dentist, but I can tell that shit ain't healthy
I'm an apprentice, so won't you please come and help me?
I've no experience, I need to be taught in the craft
There are some theories, and it's kinda hot in the trash
But gotta finish, honestly I thought it was ash
The points diminish, increasingly a horrible past
So thank you for the waffles, hope I got you with the rhymes
That shit wasn't half awful, what'll happen the next time?