Bits (pt. 2 - The Fear)

[Verse 1]
Sometimes, melancholy appeasement
Is better than the feeling in my head
I'm trying to lean towards betterment
I'm trying not to feel forced sentiments
It's kinda like the cinammon challenge
Everyone's like, "I can do it!", then you're spitting and off-balance
And balance is key for your battles, you ask me
The last three to battle me just balanced on asphalt
And that ass fell
I as well, dry spell, desert
Cos I don't do invaluable endeavours
So I'd rather be present and president
Of my tail feathers by my goddamn self, hm
Clever, yes I am
My letterman jacket is the whole damn alphabet
The Greek-Roman alphabet
Heiroglyphs, Malkovich, climb inside my mind
And have some Alpha-Bits
We could do calculus
Yes I have a calibre
I don't take phallus or [?] status over conversation stamina
Not hummina-hummina conversation stamina
I mean common denominator chatter
Interests, teach me something
That keeps me wanting to keep learning to keep coming
Back for more, score, flaws, don't see 'em
If we got the foundation
I don't want the concealer or the make-up or the base
Oh lord, trace me like you're applying for art school
I'll sit on a stool, ask questions
It's pleasant when somebody has attention centered
We all want a bit of orbiting
Nobody wants to be the morbid maudlin
I like to be around your frame often
I should tell you more
Consider this the place card I put in my hand with my heart
I'll probably leave it adjacent to your hand
So I don't damage it far, because it's hard
But my main intentions are...

[Verse 2]
Slices of me cross-sectioned like tree trunks
Open for your reading if you need or want
Feeling all jittery
And my placement of arms is less than suave
I guess it's odd, I'm normally very nonchalant
So mazel-tov on that
For throwing me off my guard, hard
So I'm automatically audibly sort of "Oh, drat"
Caught up in old patterns
Some days I wake up like, today it's gonna happen
I'll embrace him in the way, there's no evasive action
And then I'll tell him all the ways he makes my state enraptured
Face him to face with absolute and base attraction
But it's more, so I fail
Capital "F" circled with a red pen
And a tail-note saying "64,"
"Just tell him he's the one and you could pass the shit course"
But I freeze up and never do more
He's that memory card
That I keep turnin' over, hopin' that it'll match
I got a keep it pretty sober man, whenever we pass
I wanna need him in the fall
The future, the past
Fuckin' 5.30pm, 3.20am, noon
Whenever everything is, whenever it's not, too
Whenever we're just energy
I'm getting existential
But he makes me wanna get pencils and fill out Scantrons
Write things, take walks, visit a damn farm
Be calm, be a mom...
A bit of a jump there, yes
Apologies for that though, truth
Ain't no better quality to boost
If I lose him to somebody it's because
I never really had him
And my love is fantastic
So it's fear
Nothing in the universe comes close, my dear
Pedantic, romantic, hopeless
Maybe he'll just hear this now and know this...
Maybe he'll just hear this now and know...