THE OLD PARTY GOER S LAMENT

Alright, getting ready for a good night out Have I got everything?
Now, let's check it out
I've got a bunch of flowers for the girl
Or should I be starting saying the woman, now really?
Got some sweets for her two kids
Should I offer to be paying for her babysitter as well?
New questions I ask myself
It's all getting tricky
My life's been a big mess
Since I turned forty
Back in the days, it was all so simple. You just met the girl at the pub
and offered her a drink or an e' and that was it. If she said yes, then
you knew she'd probably end up in your bed.
Now the girl's turned into a fully grown woman with kids and a job.
She might even want to pay for her own drinks!
Now, that could come handy as I'm virtually skint to tell you the truth.
And what do I tell her about my job? I've never had a proper job
really I'm gonna tell her I'm a sort of self-employed consultant in
well whatever!

Maybe I shouldn't have dumped Belinda, or Sarah!
Or even erm what's her name again...? that plump ginger girl
Well, she was kind of all right