Phobia

Help me understand all my phobia's
Shower talk leads to sabotage
I'm thinking bout it too much
Hyperventilate till I asphyxiate
The dread of death excessive
Scared of future, past, can't live in the present
Use mistakes as a weapon
Beat me senseless till I'm shakin
Weeping at the fact my life gon be ending

The what if's are the questions
I don't know
Why do I worry about what's gonna unfold?
Is death close?
Is there hope?
What the fuck is at the end of the road?
Conscious so concerned
Afraid to make the wrong turn
Where could I end up CEO or in the dirt?

In the present smoking for the thrill
Binging to the point need an ounce just to chill
In this rat race another victim to their game
Spending all my money on poison for my brain
Wasting potential getting high every night
Wishing I'd do something with my fucking life

Help me understand all my phobia's
Am I scared to live like a sheep
Follow everyone into the heap
Of broken dreams
Amass to nothing
Die slowly with the dread I could've been something
I'm fucking done
The cries for help
I hear nothing
It's on my own stop the fussin
Power in my hands
Take's time constructin
I know how I want my life to go
Better start with foundation
Let me give it a go