Kick My Ass

Well, I walked up to the bar,
I laid down my Platinum card,
Then I ordered 50 longnecks for my new friends
Well, the barmaid passed them out,
And before we chugged them down,
I held mine up and said, "Here's to us and them"
Well, this blonde slid up to me,
She said, "That was awful sweet!",
Then I saw her boyfriend, wide as he was tall
Well, he broke up our hug
With a six-foot-five-inch shove,
And I found myself slammed up against the wall.

Why does everybody want to kick my ass?
I'm just tryin' to have a little fun
For all the ones who can't
And just because I kiss the prettiest girls
And I drive my truck to fast
Why does everybody want to kick my ass?

Well, I've never been the type
To walk up and pick a fight--
I've always been the kind to get along
I throw parties all the time
And they're always on my dime,
We drink and dance and smoke until the dawn.
Well, my style of stress relief
Sometimes disturbs the peace,
The police show up to donuts in my yard
And while the Zeppelin's playin' loud,
They run off my party crowd
They cuff my wrists and throw me down so hard.

Why does everybody want to kick my ass?
I'm just tryin' to have a little fun
For all the ones who can't
And just because I kiss the prettiest girls
And I drive my truck to fast
Why does everybody want to kick my ass?

And just because I kiss the prettiest girls
And I drive my truck to fast
Why does everybody want
It seems like everybody wants
Why does everybody want to kick my ass?