Forever Numb

When will I no longer have to feel?
Disassembled to the core
A grieving broken man
In darkness I will shine
Reborn a broken man
My reflection laughs at me
A cold and withered man
Tormented by my past
Too much to comprehend
When I need a fix
I itch and start to shake (shake shake)
Uncontrollably this habit I can't seem to break
A lucid nightmare
From which I cannot wake (wake up)
My eyes deceive my mind
Can't discern what's real or fake
Stormin early in the morning
My mind won't let me sleep
I'm sippin on my Mana' I'm bout half a handle deep
I'm counting shots and bars
While you be counting sheep
All the swallowers I want 'em
The spitters you can keep
Pussy
Every - Every
Everyday this life been harder
Ever since I lost my daughter
I try my best to stay afloat but I'd rather be underwater
Let me drown
Don't attempt to bring me back up to the surface
With her gone I feel so worthless
And like now I have no purpose
Deep hatred burns inside
I can't comprehend why
They took you from my side
Without a chance to say goodbye
It cuts me open wide
In agony I reside
Pain that is perennial
One which will not subside
I remember the call
Like it was yesterday
Tears filled my eyes
I screamed in silence
Couldn't reach out to Tay
Straight filled with disbelief
Still can't accept it's real
Forever numb & yearning for the day I no longer have to feel