Barroom Hitz (Parody of ”Ballroom Blitz”)

Are you ready, Keith? Uh huh
Stanley? Yeah! Ted? OK
Alright, fellas, let's go!

Oh, kids benefit from Mozart
Even if they think the dude's a dweeb, uh huh
With "Twinkle Twinkle's" words changed
That guy could help you learn your ABC's
Oh, I see a man with the flag sing the National Anthem
In his eyes an incredible song
But the bar on the corner's where the poet and lawyer
Named Francis Scott Key got that music from

Oh, yeah, it was enlightening – everybody's rewriting
And the music they're spoofing – and they all starting new things!
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
And the plan of attack is give 'em Bible facts
With reworded tunes from barroom hits
And the Salvation Army and dinosaurs like Barney
Use converted tunes that's all our group did
Borrowed bits of barroom hits, borrowed bits of barroom hits

Oh, reaching out to unchurched
Teaching those who occupy the pews
If some may call us posers
I really feel there's nothing left to prove
And the monks in the black robes sang contrafactums
Their praises ascend to the sky
If the Lord's in your corner, then everything's purer
He can cure you in the twinkling of an eye

Oh, yeah, if you think Wesley
Would panic at Presley
Then on next Christmas Eve, please
Take a long look at "Greensleeves"

And the plan of attack is give 'em Bible facts
With reworded tunes from barroom hits
And Weird Al has accordions we use a concordance
When converting tunes with borrowed bits of barroom hits

Oh, yeah, it was enlightening – everybody's rewriting
And the music they're spoofing – and they all starting new things!
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

And the plan of attack is give 'em Bible facts
With reworded tunes from barroom hits
And the girl Fannie Crosby employed that quite a lot
She used converted tunes that's all our group did
Borrowed bits of barroom hits

Let's fix the barroom hits, let's fix the barroom hits
Let's fix the barroom hits, let's fix the barroom hits
Yeah, fix the barroom hits!