Hourglass Pt.II

I’m feeling that pain,
Emotionally drained,
Profusely trying to remove this stain,
On my clothes, on my soul,
To be happy in life is that not the goal?
To be or not to be,
There is no alternative,
I wish my pops surely chose the alternative,
I had this bottled in,
The key was discarded,
You walk out on your family, but seek to be applauded,
Seek to be lauded,
Loved & respected,
Respect is earned & yours needs correctin’,
It needs some checking,
Reviewed for errors,
I’m not talking syntax,
I’m not talking refreshers,
Spare me the tic tacs,
Spare me the chit chat,
Spare me the excuses cause you know I’m not with that,
I try to be cordial,
Try to be loyal,
I try to vent to those who lend me their shoulders,
To lean on & cry,
I need to get this off, but I don’t mean to pry,
I’ll surely try,
To be more forthcoming,
To speak on my humming,
The Beat of life is what I’m drumming,
I want to be loving, I want to be trusting, but my impure soul needs some dusting,
…
Heartbreak,
Part 2,
The pain is in the rear view,
Demeanor was bright now it has a slight shade of blue,
Come correct or not at all, consider this your interview,
Not a hitter but I know some & they’ll come to finish you,
Dead,
You wanna get street with it right?
You want to spill the beans without the beef in it right?
You want to take my girl so you can hit for the night?
I ain’t trippin cause my words hit hardest in any fight,
Lyrical, satirical, empirical, unbelittable, cut your ass off like the mf umbilical,
Cord,
Floored,
Legs off the board, otp with the lord cause your knocking on death’s door,
I try to be Jekyll, but y’all bringing out the Hyde,
I try to appease all, follow rules & abide,
I try to tell the truth but I’m always told I lied,
I used to be a punk, kicked rocks, sat & cried,
In the past, but those days are long gone,
Back when I wasn’t seeing no money from the songs,
Back when home was where I truly belong,
Back when people gave a damn & actually got tf along,
Excuse me,
Do you not see me speaking?
Watch your mouth or there will be some red fluid leaking,
From your jaw, southpaw, leave ya ass in straight awe,
I got a vice grip on the rap game with these bear claws,
Damn,
So I’m insufficient right?
Testing me must be your mission right?
I guess you haven’t heard that you’re pissing off the wrong guy, I walk around the BS i don’t stand & compromise,
Sorry not sorry,
Never been the bigger person,
I cut ties quick, I hope the devil doesn’t curse them,
Looking for a handout but I don’t give reimbursements,
Steady in my business but this doesn’t even concern them,
You ever needed a lot of help so mama sent a lifeline,
You ever needed to break break with some water & not the wine,
You ever had a girl in your grasp then she ghosted for a long time,
I never been in front, kissing asses & behinds,
Trying to make amends with people who had me condemned,
Trying to say amen yet others won’t even commend,
Got blessings to send, but never helping hands to lend,
They can stretch me back, but this spirit’ll never bend,
On god,